Vlogs?

So I apologize for missing an update, but seriously my life is not too interesting to be writing new blogs everyday. I was thinking of possibly making a vlog? I need to create a new youtube account to upload my vids because apparently I forget my password to everything (i had already changed the password to this blog three times -.-)

Hopefully my vlogs will be a lot more interesting than what's laid out to you in black and white. And word of caution, i don't have a Mac so my videos will probably end up looking blurred or pixelated. But I'll try my best...

SERIOUSLY I WANT A MACBOOK!

....way more than this guy.

p.s. i'm also thinking about working up a new layout. but my html skills are dusty and flaked

i close,
this has been 5% your DV of junk

adam sandler purchases a universal remote at BB&B

So apparently my diet and exercise regimen is failure. But I've made a bet to lose 10lbs by the end of the summer. I just really need some support and motivation from my friends. It's hard doing it alone and temptation is so easy to give into.

I decided to take up on an easy jog today from Williamsburg all the way to the Staten Island ferry. It reminded me of old times when I used to run this path almost everyday last summer. Only this time I was alone. When I got to Staten Island ferry, I decided to take a stroll down Battery Park. I looked disgusting among the sea of tourists lol. I think I walked around for a good half an hour until I decided to head to Bed Bath and Beyond. I just absolutely loveeeeeee going into home goods stores. There are so many items to buy and abosolutely nothing worth getting! I did however see this awesome comforter, duvet set, pillow and bed sheets, and a sham all for $99 and it came in this neat drawstring package. I WANT IT! But then again I want many things. This summer I'm trying to save up for an Asus netbook worth about $400. On the other hand, I really really really want the new Macbook more than anything. But I feel too guilty asking my mom to get it for me. She's been working up two jobs lately, literally working over 12 hours a day.

Sigh... oh incase you're wondering, I ended up purchasing a digital scale and a 64oz water container from Bed Bath and Beyond. It's practical... and it was less than $40 total!!!! (Not exactly a great bargain but my purchases are no longer worthless impulses)

i close,
this has been 4% the DV of junk

in my dreams will i ever pass my driver's test

...actually it's NOT EVEN in my dreams will i ever pass my driver's test. Apparently my lack of driving skills dares itself to haunt me in my sleep...
I was at my cousin's house one cold night and i got really bored so I went outside to read a book in my dad's car. I got inside and sat on the passenger seat when suddenly the car started moving and going down a hill. Needless to say I was in trouble. I thought I was going to die as the vision of my last car accident flashed right before my eyes again. I didn't even say a prayer as a I struggled on the floor trying to hit the brakes with my hands (I know right wth?). As the car kept going and going it went straight through many green lights as passengers nearby honked and yelled. I just kept saying to myself that I was going to die and my dad would kill me. I struggled and struggled trying with all my might to extend my left arm to reach the brakes as I'm struggling to stand up in the raging car. Eventually I gave up trying to reach the brakes and decided to climb up to the driver's seat and take the wheel. I stood up half way trying to keep my balance and sort of rolled over to take the wheel. -I had succeeded. But this time I was in the ride for my life. More and more cars came in my way as I tried to swerve past them. Eventually I drove further and further trying to hit the brakes at the right moment as I came upon a dead end. This time I really had to stop or I'd crash. Frightened by the thought of my last crash encounter, I turned the wheel left and hit the brakes as hard as I could. And finally I came to a halt. I got out of the car.. not knowing where I was. I felt like crying and I should've gotten back in the car to drive myself back to my cousin's house. But my common sense was harbored by my fears of death and driving again. So I started running towards a crowd of people walking in two lanes, leaving the car behind. One lane was going north and the other going south. Not knowing which path took me back to my rightful place, I decided to head north and see if I could recognize a familiar surrounding. The walk kept on going and going for a really long time. Eventually I asked someone next to me where this path was headed and he replied, "Minnesota". WTF? I WAS HEADING TOWARDS MINNESOTA?!!!! I quickly switched lanes and the moment I started heading South I saw my high school friends. I was relieved to see familiar faces. I told them my situation and they laughed and reminded me how screwed I was.

I finally got back to my cousin's house and I tried to look for my dad and tell him the whole situation plus.. he had to get his car back because there's no way in hell I could've drove again. Unfortunately my dad wasn't there so I decided to go back once again and follow the crazy trail of my dad's car embedded all over the soft white snow on the ground. I went out but it started getting cold and snowy and I was wearing my sleeping shorts by then. I got back in the house to change into sweats but I couldn't find it under the heaping pile of clothes (even my messy clothes in my room haunts me in my sleep!). After awhile of searching I grew tired and fell asleep, noting myself that I'll retrieve the car once I wake up...

...and so I woke up to reality. But the funny thing was I was panicing because I still had the thoughts of my dad's lost car instilled in my head. I was still in my shorts and the same hoodie I was wearing from my dream. I was so confused because half of my brain was telling me that I have the duty to retrieve that car and the other half was telling me that it was all I dream. I felt like calling my dad and asking him where exactly did he park his car to make sure that it didn't match the setting of my dream. After going through every possible detail of my dream I finally came to a conclusion that it was just all a figment of my nightmare. It couldn't have been real because it was snowing in my sleep and it's close to summer time in reality. Still the dream was so intense it led me to believe that it was real.. and it drove me insane -.-


From this little head trip of mine I think I fear driving even more now. And what was once a goal of getting my liscence when I'm 25 has now gotten pushed back a few more years...possibly to never?

i close,
this has been 3% your DV of junk.

leave for exit 16

Happy Memorial's Day!
I really wish I were at a BBQ event right now. But instead my entire family went upstate to do our annual shopping at Woodbury. This is one of the rarer opportunities to hang out as a family. I wish my family spent more time together. We never eat dinner together anymore, and to be honest these past couple of weeks I haven't even had a full family sit in for supper. I also wish my family was more emotionally unfettered. I don't think I've ever said, "i love you", to my parents. It's not exactly a very Asian thing to do- especially for Chinese families. I feel like if we want to express our emotions, everything has to be presented through our actions. While we were shopping today, I realized my mom gets teased a lot by everyone in the family. My brother easily gets irritated by her, and that includes me and my dad too. I feel bad that I respond to her with a sense of annoyance. Even though I love her as my mother, it's very difficult for me to show it. I'm just really scared that if anything were to ever happen to her, it would be too late to express how much I really care for her. But as her daughter, I think this situation is pretty unconditional. Still... I think it's difficult to be a mother and never hear the three simple words coming from your children...

i close,
this has been 2% of your DV of junk.

running my summer

Wow. Keeping up with blogging has came a long way since my junior high school days. FYI, I got suspended in seventh grade for posting a one sentence blog about how I hate my teacher for giving us unnecessary punishments. Needless to say, my blogging ways were short lived. I guess I'm back because I'm jumping into a bandwagon... and also I need something to do on the computer. I'll try to update as much as possible. DISCLAIMER: i get real lazy.

My layout is lame.
I forgot a lot of junk and deal with HTML and photoshop. But I'll see if I can whip up something in the long run.

This summer is really dull. I'm spending the majority of my time either working or going to the gym. My freshman weight gain has gotten me really depressed. And honestly hearing, "You're so skinny!" or "Where does it all go?" doesn't exactly make it better either. I'm trying to control my oral fixation but my weight depression is only making it worse. I end up eating twice as much. Fuck my weak willpower. I want to wear jeans again!! -Sorry you have to read about a nasty rant about girl problems. I think you get and hear that enough from other skinny bitches. oh excuse my french on this blog.

I'm working at a chinese health clinic throughout the rest of my summer. At first I was really peevish about the whole thing. I'm surrounded by ten other co-workers and they're very limited in speaking english. Aside from that, I'm sure many have heard about the infamous "Dragon Lady" whom I get annoyed of. On my first day of work, she literally glowered at me and blamed whatever that went wrong in the clinic on me. But of course, being the newbie at work makes me the scapegoat to everyone's problems. I was silly to cry that day in the little girl's bathroom. But what can I say, I cry easily. But honestly, as the days have gone by I'm actually getting really accustomed to everything now. Just recently I got promoted from filing to making phone calls to patients (I just love talking to the little grandpoppies on the other line. hehe). And my relationship with the "Dragon Lady" is getting better too. The other day while I was sorting out scheduled charts, she sat down with me and talked about what I'm planning to major in. I told her about possibly pursuing physical therapy and she literally scoffed at my response..okay but that's not the point. She gave me a lot advice and options that I can work with in the health field. But I'm still hemming and hawing about what I want to be. We also talked about how college has changed since the last few years. It's gotten much more expensive. She told me that she had to spill out 52K for her son's education at Carnegie Mellon. She likes to talk about her son often during work and how much he has grown. She even mentioned how she never hit him.. and that really got to me. I guess she is very human after all. I should stop calling her the Dragon Lady. But it has a very mythical oomph to it.

Today is my best friend's birthday (i love how i never transition in new thoughts). I feel bad that I didn't do anything more with her. We basically met up two hours later than the original time and what did we end up doing? -Running the manhattan bridge of course!

yay cardio. nay my messed up knee joints.

i close,
this has been 1% of your DV of junk.